Sunday, September 9, 2007

The River's Call-FanFic, NC-17, Adult situations

Prologue (1938)

“Excuse me.”
Ciara looked away from the wash she was hanging to see a boy standing in front of her. He wasn’t exactly a boy, but neither was he a young man. He had to be just a bit younger than she was.
“Well, now, what do we have here?”
“Please, ma’am, I’d like to join you.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“I am running away. I want to join you and your friends on the river.”
He gestured towards the river where the boats sat moored, just out of sight.
“How old are you?”
“I am 14, 15 in two months.”
“I see. And why would you be running away?”
“I live with my grandparents since my parents died. I don’t want to any more. I want to see the world.”
“I see. Well, I’ll tell you what, uh, what is your name?”
“Roux.”
“Roux. Let me make you a deal. I’ll bet that your grandparents would be devastated if you disappeared. If you will make me a promise, I will make one to you.”
“What do I have to promise?”
She walked over to a log and pulled a battered guitar from where it rested. Kneeling before him, she held it out.
“Take care of this for me. If you stay here, and learn to play it I promise to come get you when you turn 18.”
“Why?”
“Well, it belonged to my papa. He is no longer around and I cannot play it, no matter how I try. It is lonely for the touch of a male.”
“I see. Is that all I have to promise?”
“Stay with your grandparents. Go to school; be good, and helpful to them. In three years and two months, I promise, I will be back here for you, and I will show you the world.”
Roux thought about it. When he looked at her, a lock of hair fell into his eyes. Ciara reached up and brushed it aside.
“Deal?”
“Deal.”
Chapter One (1941)
Roux
Every day he replayed the conversation in his mind, saw the young woman in his dreams. Roux knew she would keep her promise. He had kept his, returning to his grandparents that day doing everything she had asked him to do. She had to come back for him, there was nothing left for him here.
Just after the first of the year PePaw had become ill. He lasted to see the first day of spring. NaMaw was heartbroken, and joined him soon after. Roux had spent the last few months alone in the house, packing away his past. He had decided that even if she didn’t come for him, he was going to find her. The alternative was not pleasant. Hitler was on the move in Europe, and it would only be a matter of time before they came looking for soldiers. He wanted no part of it. Life on the river could be his escape. 1941 was shaping into an awful year for him, at least the first half. The turning point was at the bend in the river, a place he visited often, trying to look beyond to his future.
Roux pulled the cord on his bag tight. In it was his life. A few books, clothes, some pictures. Everything else in the house was being left behind. He had given the house to the local church, to use as they saw fit. The cupboards were stocked for them and all of the furnishings were in place. It was clean and ready for who ever was coming. Hoisting the bag onto his shoulder, he looked about the house for a last time. He picked up the guitar, now nestled in the leather case he had made for it.
“Good-bye PePaw. Good-bye NaMaw. I love you both.
There was one errand he wanted to run before going to the river. Meeting up with the girl and the rest of her people empty handed wouldn’t do, some gifts were needed. No one in town knew he was leaving. He had no close friends or ties here, but no enemies either. It had never been a warm community, and leaving it didn’t make him sad. He put his things behind the shed and walked the two blocks to town.

Ciara
“Here, stop here!”
The old man at the helm turned in toward the bank. It was just as Ciara remembered it, except now the field beyond was covered in wildflowers. She couldn’t wait to find Roux and fought the urge to jump in the water and run to the shore and find him. Her best dress wouldn’t hold up to that. Ciara was too excited to concentrate. Natalie, the fortune teller, told her he would remember her, he would be waiting. What had he grown into?
“Miss Ciara, you are sure about this now?”
“Yes David, I am. We have time to deliver those papers. I made sure of it.”
Once the craft was to shore and the plank laid over the water, the helmsman helped her down.
“Can you manage to get set without me?”
“And what if I said no?” He laughed at her. “Go get into town. Find your young man. Just be back before dark, with or without.”
Ciara smiled and planted a kiss on his cheek. She ran up the slope into the field of flowers. Stopping, she picked a few, twining them into her hair. As she walked, she replayed the day she met him. It felt both right and strange, coming back for him. They had only five minutes of history, but she felt as if she had left something of herself here with him and took something of him with her. She had thought of little else but the promise she had made him. Everyone was tired of hearing her story, and as June neared, they almost had to tie her to the anchor to keep her from floating off on the prospect of returning to find him. She reached the edge of town and her stomach began to flutter. What if he wasn’t here? What if they had moved? No! She told herself he was here and she would find him. It was just a matter of asking about for him. Entering the first shop she came to, a tobacco store, she began her inquiry and search for the boy, now man, named Roux.





Chapter Two:
Roux
Why hadn’t he ever asked the girl her name? He had asked himself that question many times. The girl he dreamed of never spoke her name, nor did he ever try to find one for her. No name he would ever apply would be right, he knew that. As he crested the small knoll that led to the banks, his heart began to race. A smile spread over his face as he realized that the mystery would soon be solved. He saw boats! They were here!
He looked over the gathering of people working below, anchoring the boats, building a fire. Children ran about with dogs, their laughter reaching him. There was a rope up and some laundry hanging. He remembered the day he met her, the day he wanted to run away. She had been removed from the others doing her laundry. Roux had watched her for a short time, how she soaked the clothing then rubbed it against the washboard, soaked it and wrung it out, laying it on a tarp to take back and hang. Her movements had fascinated him and when he had felt confident enough he had approached her.
Watching the group now below him, he forced himself not to run. His eyes scanned the people, looking for her. One man took notice of him and began to walk towards him.
“Well met, friend. Can I help you?”
“I don’t know. Uh…”
Roux was at a loss for words, meeting what was to be his destiny. He just looked at the man, trying to figure out what he wanted to say.
“You wouldn’t happen to be the young man Ciara promised to return for, would you? Roux is it?”
Relief flooded Roux and he realized he had been holding his breath.
“Yes. Roux. That would be me.”
“Well, she went off to try to find you before anchor had set. Welcome to the River Rats.”
The man clapped him on the back and shook his hand.
“Thank you. Should I go back to look for her?”
“No. No. Ciara’ll be back before long. I am David. Come on, and meet everyone.”
David led him to the shore and began to introduce him to the others. He smiled and shook hands and was hugged. These people seemed to know him and he was a little overwhelmed. He’d have to work to learn the names. Name. He knew her name now…Ciara. David led him to a boat and down to a bunk, showed him where he could stow his things. They took a seat on the deck and the older man called a couple of young boys over.
“You two need to go play look out. We want to hide Roux when Ciara gets back from town. Go to the paths, and you know the call to give when she is coming. Get now.”
Roux watched the young boys scramble up the hill, intent in their duty. They each chose a tree and shimmied up to hide in the branches.
“Are they yours?”
“One is, they all are, and they are everyone’s. We are a small floating community, Roux. We live by some different rules than what you may have grown up with. This is one big family, and we all look out for one another. Our work makes it necessary. We travel, we stop, we sell goods trinkets and services, we leave and go on to the next. Gypsies, if you will.”
Roux listened, learning what life as a River Rat was like. Gypsies. Trinkets, services. Family.
“I see you have a guitar. That’ll be of great service to you on the river. Music is always welcome.”
“Ciara gave me that three years ago.”
“Ah, that’s where it went to. I remember her mentioning it now. She is a good girl. We got her as an orphan, found her alone and lost and hungry. She is pretty much the leader for us. Keeps everything going smooth. Has a good head, is very smart.”
David stopped and listened.
“There it is. She is coming in. Go, hide on the boat until I get you.”
Roux stepped down inside the boat to hide before she topped the knoll. He found a spot where he could see her as she approached. His heart pounded so hard he was sure she’d hear it. She came into view, the sun as it set lighting her. She carried packages and he had to stop himself from running out to her, carrying her down the bank himself. He saw some of the others run to her and get her things. David was talking to her, but couldn’t make out what was being said. A frown played at her mouth and brow. She was so near he could smell her perfume. She took her shoes off and waded in.
He watched her, his breath gone. She brushed her hair from her eyes, and he remembered her touch on his brow when she did the same thing to him. His hand traveled to the spot and he could again feel her hand. Tears sprang to his eyes, and a lump came up in his throat.
“Hang on a sec, Ciara.”
David walked up the plank and ducked into the cabin. His legs shaking, Roux stepped out onto the deck. She wasn’t looking his direction and had no idea he was there. He smiled and trembled. Taking a deep breath he spoke.
“Excuse me.”


Ciara
The day had been a waste. Everyone had been pleasant to her, and a few said they had seen Roux, but didn’t know where he was or where he might have been headed. She had bought a few supplies and treats in the town and knew that the sun would be going down soon, so, frustrated and sad, she started back to the boats. Making her way back, she went to the house as a last stop, but it was empty. Perhaps tomorrow she would locate him.
She heard the boys calling to David to let him know she returned. He always kept someone on a look out whether a member of the group was out or not. With the war, AWOL soldiers and escaped prisoners roamed the outskirts of towns, looking for food and shelter. Thieves, rapists and other criminals took advantage as well. Most were not pleasant to deal with. The familiar camp set up came to view and the boys ran to meet her and took her packages. David met her at the base of the knoll.
“Any luck?”
“No. He is in town, but no one knew where. They said he had been in at a couple of the shops, but I had missed him by too much I guess. I even found out where he lived but he wasn’t there either. I’ll try again tomorrow.”
“I am sure you’ll find him, or him you if he still is interested.”
“My feet are tired and hot.” Ciara took off her shoes and waded into the water, cooling her feet.
“You’ll feel better after a rest and some dinner.”
“I’m not hungry.”
“You will be. Hang on a sec Ciara.”
She watched the kids playing on the banks, tagging each other and squealing as they ran away. Their laughter always cheered her. One day, that sound would come from her children. But for now, she had to keep her mind straight. If she didn’t find Roux tomorrow, she wasn’t sure they could stay another day. Those papers had to get to the right people in time. Sighing, she pushed the thought away. She still had tomorrow. If she had to, she’d go at dawn and sit on his doorstep until…
“Excuse me.”
Ciara spun around at the deep voice, familiar in its phrase.
Roux!
The young boy who had just reached her shoulder three years ago was now standing in front of her. Now, she was the one to reach his shoulder in height. Her blood raced to her face and she began to make her way to the plank. He reached out and offered a hand to her. Her eyes took in his face and her hand moved to follow. There was just a touch of the weight of youth left in his jaw, a fine spatter of hair growing along its edge. His eyes were a dark brown, full of…expectation?
“Ciara.”
She watched as his mouth formed her name, the thin upper lip coming to rest on the dollop of the bottom, parted then by his tongue. She swallowed hard, fighting tears.
”You grew up.”
He laughed a warm, low laugh and she threw herself into his arms. She felt his surprise melt into the hug and he held her close. His breath tickled her ear.
“Oh, Roux, I am so happy we found you, or you found us. I have waited for this day.”
“Me too.”
They stood in their embrace until the sound of applause intruded. Everyone had gathered and was watching the reunion. Color flooded into both their faces, and Ciara stepped away, holding tight to his hand. She wasn’t about to let go of him now.
“Everyone, meet Roux!”
“We already have.”
Laughter came from the crowd.
“Oh, yes, I guess you have. Carry on!”
Ciara led Roux to the edge of the deck to sit on the rail.
“I can’t believe you are here. You are really here.”
“I know. I feel a bit overwhelmed. I just want...”
“What?”
“I just want to sit here and look into your eyes. You have no idea how much I have wanted to be with you again.”
Ciara lowered her head. He was saying what she felt. His slender finger tipped her head back up.
“You changed my life. The promise you made me changed everything.”
She was surprised at his statement.
“Oh, Roux. I did it because I didn’t want to ruin a family. I would have taken you that day if you hadn’t had a family.”
“Hey, you two.”
“Yes Cassie?”
“Let’s eat. You can catch up later.”
“Okay. Coming.”
Ciara stood. She still had hold of Roux’s hand and led him to the table. All through dinner, the conversation was light. Each time she brushed against him, she felt a warmth go through her. She was afraid she would wake up from this dream and find that they were still miles away from him. The sound of his voice as he asked and answered questions, his laughter, the way he would stop what he was doing to look at her all told her it was no dream. It was real, and he was with her.

Chapter Three
Roux
After dinner, Roux helped with the dishes and clean up. He was to be a part of the crew now, and needed to learn the routines and ways. Once it was all put away, they sat side by side on deck chairs looking out over the water. June was singing with the crickets and frogs, and a gentle breeze played with the trees. The sun had set, and the stars shone in the early summer sky.
“So, tell me about your life on the river.”
“Well, over all, it isn’t much. I’ve been with the River Rats for ten years now. My parents abandoned me. They were, well, not very nice people. Confidence artists. The last town we lived in ran them out and they left me there. Being their child, no one wanted to trust that I wasn’t just like them, so I was run out of town as well. David and Cassie found me and took me in.”
Ciara paused. Roux could see that even after ten years, talking about her parents hurt her. Having lost his own parents, albeit in a different manner, he knew the feelings of loss and loneliness that came with the sense of abandonment.
“These folks are good people that found each other in various ways. Living a conventional life never seeing what the world has to offer was not an option for them. Many are skilled craftsmen and women, handy to fix things or make things. Many of the places we visit look forward to our return, because it is the only time certain goods or services are available. Although, with the climate of the world today, the war and the growth, we are becoming a dying breed. Sometimes, a member of our group stays on, sets up shop and home. We travel on during the days, and look for a spot at night to dock, if possible.”
She smiled at Roux and reached to take his hand. He loved the feeling of her hands, lithe and tanned, smooth and strong. He squeezed it and smiled at her.
“I do need to explain something to you though. We now have a mission in our travels.”
“Oh?”
“We are still able to travel the waters without too much interference from the Nazi’s. We can slip in and out of an area without anyone knowing we were there. We seem to be aimless drifters that come and go with the tide. Due to our unique lifestyle, we were approached and asked to take on a task.”
Ciara let go of his hand and walked to the rail, looking up to the night sky. The pale light from the moon sparkled on the water and her face, giving her an ethereal glow. Roux resisted the urge that welled up in him to go to her and take her in his arms and make everything else go away. What she was sharing with him was important and he focused on what she was saying.
“I will understand if, after hearing our mission, you choose to stay behind. It is dangerous, and not everyone is cut out for it. We do not involve the children directly, although they do help with our cover.”
Roux felt a knot of apprehension as she spoke. Something told him the carefree lifestyle he had dreamed of was not what he was getting into.
“Ciara, what is it you do?”
“We deliver documents for the Allies. We are a part of the war effort.”
Roux felt as if someone had stolen the air from his lungs. His thoughts of escaping involvement in the war dissipated like the smoke from a cigarette. He leaned forward in his seat, resting his arms on his thighs, dropping his head. Ciara came to stand in front of him, then knelt down and took his hands in hers. He could smell her faint cologne as she leaned her head on his.
“Roux, I have longed for this day, the day we would come back for you. When I made you the promise, they had not yet told me what our work was. When I turned 18, they told me, and over the past year, I have taken over the operation. I am inconspicuous and best suited to the deliveries. I have feared telling you what we do, because I don’t want you to leave again. But, I have to be fair to you.”
Roux raised his head and found his eyes locked with hers. The endless depths he found in there drew him in and set his soul with light. Years of dreaming of looking at her like this, smelling her, touching her all came back and he knew that he would walk across a battlefield just to see her smile.
“How could I leave you again? You are all I have ever wanted. I don’t care what the circumstances are, I will always stay with you.”
He had never been one to hold his thoughts in before; he always said what was on his mind. Life was too short for games and being coy. He believed in always being honest. His heart told him he was to be with Ciara and he wanted to let her know how he felt. Tears sprang to her eyes and he reached up to wipe one away as it dropped down her cheek. His thumb caressed the fine line of her cheekbone and he leaned in to kiss her. Her soft mouth welcomed his and he felt a satisfying warmth.
“Oh, Roux, you have no idea how happy this makes me.”
He slid out of the chair and sat next to her on the deck, wrapping her in his arms. Her head nestled against his chest, stirring him. He would not take the chance on time interfering and separating them again. It had already taken three years and he swore it would take no more. As soon as he could, he would ask her to marry him.

Ciara
The weight of their secret mission was now gone from Ciara. As she sat in the moonlight in his arms, for the first time in over three years, she had no anticipation of what was to come. She was free to live life for each day, to discover it with Roux.
“You know, I got gifts before I left town, and never gave them out.” Roux’s voice was smooth in her hair. She could feel it in his chest as he spoke. There was such comfort and safety in his arms she didn’t care what he said as long as it vibrated against her ear.
“Mmm?”
“Gifts. I have something for you.”
He got up and entered the cabin returning with a small box for her. She pulled the string and opened it to find a small, egg shaped stone on a leather chord. Holding it up to the moonlight she saw that it had no distinct color. Roux took it from her and fastened it around her neck.
“I worked in town this past year for the tanner. I learned how to make these. I made this one for you; the stone changes color in different light. It is powerful and has great love and luck attached to it.”
“Oh Roux, its beautiful!”
She kissed his cheek, and they both stopped, holding the other’s eyes. Roux bent his head catching her mouth with his. The kiss took her breath away and she felt it echo deep inside. His tongue parted hers and explored. Ciara had never been with a man; she had never felt the desire. The warm tingling in her heart now was foreign to her, but excited her. She could feel the heat of his hands on her ribs, his fingers brushing against the underside of her breasts through the fabric. Her knees went weak and she melted against him. When he released her she fought to stay standing.
“That was nice.”
Oh, that was a brilliant comment, she thought to herself. Roux had dropped his head, but not before she saw the flush in his cheeks. She suspected he was new to this as well. Her hand traveled up to cup his cheek and she kissed him again. She had to fight her body’s instincts as she ached to press against him, to discover more. She stepped back and took a deep shaking breath.
“I think we should turn in. We’ll weigh anchor and head out tomorrow.”
Roux walked her back to her cabin. She had her own on the main boat, while David and now Roux shared another. Families had smaller houseboats that traveled along with the flotilla. When they reached her cabin, he pulled her into his arms kissed her again, the corner of his mouth twitching up in a smile afterwards.
“Good night, Ciara.”
“Good night Roux.”
Ciara dressed for bed and lay replaying the whole day in her mind. It felt like a dream, the dream she had had for the past three years. He had let his hair grow to below his collar, but tied it back at the nape of his neck, loose tendrils framing his face. She could still see the boy in his eyes, recognized him there. The memory of his touch on her face, or when he held her hand was bringing thoughts to her mind. He was no longer a boy, he was all man and he ignited desire in her She could easily see herself making love with him in the night. Her hand traced the spot on her breast through the fabric of her night gown, the warmth she had felt from his touch coming back to her. Sex was something she hadn’t given much thought to before. Desire had never burned in her blood for anyone. She had read the novels and talked to the older women on the boat about it, and had a natural curiosity. Now, with Roux back, every thing about him piqued that curiosity further. His voice, his eyes, the mere mention of his name was enough to set her trembling in the knees. Her body was calling for him, telling her to find him and bring him to her bunk. She shoved the thoughts away. He hadn’t been with her but for a few hours. It was best to wait and let him get his sea legs. She thought she saw the same desires in his face, tasted it in his kiss. But the newness of joining the River Rats could be part of it. Time, always time, delaying her future. Obligations and others coming first. In the life they lead on the river, danger was never far off, and it was rare for missed opportunities to come again. She would confess her heart and give herself over to him, after the exchange. Laying in the dark, she drifted to sleep with the memory of his lips on hers.

The next morning after breakfast, clothes lines were pulled down, fires were snuffed and all traces of the River Rats were removed from the area. The last thing they did before leaving was to plant a couple of saplings in the field.
Ciara was occupied with giving David the directions to the drop point for the papers and Roux worked at putting things away and securing items. It was late morning by the time the water caravan was on its way. Ciara looked for Roux and found him sitting shirtless on the back rail, the sun dappling his chest. He was playing the guitar, and she stood listening. When he finished, she clapped her hands. He hadn’t heard her come up and he looked up surprised.
“That’s pretty.”
“Thanks. A song I wrote for my grandparents.”
“Don’t stop. I remember that we had a deal. I’d like to listen for a while.”
She sat in a deck chair and listened as the notes ran from his fingers to the strings to the air and over the water. The tune was crisp and clear, reflective as the surface of the river. They came in languid order, a song of a lifetime love. When he finished and the last note trailed behind them he set the guitar aside and stood, stretching. She watched his arms and chest as the muscles stretched and bunched, returning to their deceptive smoothness.
“Are there words for the song?”
“No, I could never really find the right ones. The closest I came was a title, Forever Love. My grandparents married when they were my age, and never looked back. In every thing they did, there was love and joy and sharing. It’s something I want for myself.”
He was looking out over the water as he spoke, and turned to her with the last statement.
“I want that too.”
Ciara was about to reveal her heart when Cassie called over asking for a spot to dock. Ciara stood and walked to Roux, placing her hand on his arm. She felt the muscles in his forearm jump at her touch and it sent a jolt to her blood.
“I have to go for now. But I’d like to hear more later.”
“I’ll bring the guitar out after dinner then. Can I help with anything?”
“Not now. When we dock, there will be plenty to do.”


Chapter Four
Roux
Roux was amazed at how precise the River Rats were in setting up once they found a spot to dock. As soon as anchor was dropped, planks were set up and tables were dragged to the land. He felt like he was more in the way than helpful as he looked for things to do. David took notice and sent him to help get a fire started. Food appeared from the galley of each boat and in minutes, dinner was being dished out. Pots, pans, platters and huge bowls were set on a side table buffet style; each family or person brought their own plates and service. People were up and down refilling food and plates, asking who wanted anything while they were up. Sun tea, lemonade and water were in great vats. Dinner was consumed and everyone helped clean up and pack away, so that inside of two hours dinner was set, consumed, and cleared and everyone could enjoy their evening.
A large community fire had been built to ward of predators and insects and most everyone sat around it, working on crafts, repairs or just chatting. Sunset found Roux sitting among them, playing his guitar. Ciara had gone to the main boat with David to plot out their course for the next day. The children had gathered near where Roux sat, watching him play. He played a few nursery songs and lullabies that the children could sing with and some that asked for the silence of the listener.
He watched for Ciara to come rejoin the circle. In the last light of the day he saw her at the far side, speaking to all of the boat captains giving them the instructions for the morning. She took a seat with the women and watched him play until the children’s heads started to drop. Mothers and fathers gathered their sleepy ones and retired to their cabins. Ciara came to sit by Roux as he finished his last song. The sound of the wood crackling as the fire burned mingled with the frogs and insects of the night. The last of the people had left and the fire died to a pile of glowing ash. King, one of the men on another boat was on fire watch and he appeared to take his spot for the night. He would tend the fire, keep it ready for the morning, but make sure it didn’t spread. Roux was ready to be alone with Ciara.
“I need to put Angel away, would you like to come with me?”
“Angel?”
“I named the guitar Angel, for you, after you gave her to me.”
“That is so sweet.”
The night hid his blush from her. Roux felt a bit of a fool for expecting her to make fun of him. He was beginning to realize that these people were very different from the ones he knew on land. What you were inside was the most important thing. Taking Ciara’s hand, they walked together to his bunk. She waited while he tucked Angel into her case for the night. Together, they walked around the rail of the boat, the moon playing hide and seek with them as they moved along.
“So, what is tomorrow’s plan?”
“We have to arrive at the village by lunch. We have plenty of time to get there. I need to make the drop and then we are on our way until the next call.”
“How do they find you? How do they know where you are?”
“There are certain villages and cities where Allied safe houses are set up. Word is left at these places and we check each as we come through. We are not the only messengers, and if something needs delivered and we can make it, we take the job.”
“And, in between, you just travel?”
“Pretty much. We have different artisans who make things to sell, jewelry, tools, clothing. Sometimes we stay for a few days and hire out to work. We always work for barter, or, if we get paid try to spend the money in those towns. We get paid for our work with the Allies, so we try to keep the other money in the town we get it from.”
“Do we dock every night?”
“We try. Some nights we can’t find a safe spot. We start looking around mid-afternoon, to allow enough time to find one. Sometimes, it is dark before we dock, other times we find something right off. Even though we travel the same waters, what was once safe may not be now in these times of war and invasion.”
Roux leaned on the rail, taking these thoughts in. On one hand, he felt so far removed from the war and the ugliness of Hitler and his hordes, yet he was faced with the reality that they might be even more vulnerable than others. As he turned these thoughts over in his mind like a coin in his palm, he felt Ciara come to stand next to him. He put his arm around her shoulder and drew her close to his side, letting the clouds of war in his mind dissipate. The evening breezes brought the scent of the wood fire, the green smell of the river and the night blooming jasmine to him. He looked down at Ciara. She had been watching him.
“Second thoughts?”
“Oh, hell no. I was just reflecting on how different the nights are now for me. By this time most nights, I would have been reading or asleep, alone. I’ve never smelled the night like this before. I’ve never mixed the starlight and conversation. I like it.”
“Funny you should mention how different your nights are.”
“Why is that?”
“Because, I would like to make them different in another way.”
Roux looked into Ciara’s eyes. He could see his own feelings reflected in her eyes and held his breath, wondering if she was saying what he thought she was saying.
“Roux, I think I have loved you since I first met you. I don’t want to waste any time with games. If you’ll have me, I would like to spend my life with you.”
“Ciara, are you proposing to me?”
“I guess, in a way. I am just telling you how I feel about you and what I want. I’ll understand if you want some time to adjust to this new life.”
Roux had to find his voice to answer her. When he didn’t respond, she dropped her head, and he caught her chin, turning her face back to him. He kissed her, tasting the tears he hadn’t seen. His voice was thick when he spoke.
“Yes. I want it to. So, how do River Rats get married?”

Ciara
Her heart was pounding so hard, Ciara was sure he could hear it. His silence frightened her, and she feared he was going to tell her that he wanted to wait. When she felt his forefinger touch her chin, she caught her breath, and had to remember to breathe after he kissed her. He said the words she was hoping for. She threw her arms around him, laughing.
“How do we get married? That’s a good question.”
She kissed him again and looked into his face. They laughed and he picked her up, swinging her around. She held his face between her hands, drinking in every detail. He kissed her, again and again. When he set her down, she had to brace against him, since her legs seemed to have turned to mud on her.
“We’ll talk to David tomorrow, and see what we have to do.”
“Anything for you.”
She melted into him as he pulled her close, burying his face in her hair, whispering her name.
“Ciara, I love you.”
She looked up and met his mouth, sealing their fate.

The next afternoon found the Rats docked again, and Ciara was preparing to head to the contact house. She had always gone by herself, but Roux insisted on traveling with her. Deciding that a young couple on a stroll would be passable, she agreed.
“But, you have to remain quiet and let me introduce you. Understandably, these people are very suspicious of new faces.”
“I promise.”
They walked into town and stopped at the local confectionary, had a sundae and listened to the music on the juke box. Ciara saw her contact come in and order a phosphate. She tapped Roux’s leg under the counter and walked over to the player, and stood looking at the selections. The contact, a middle aged man, walked over and stood by her. He reached in front of her and punched in a selection, and Ciara put one in as a response. The man returned to his seat, finished his drink and left.
Ciara went back to Roux at the counter, paid their bill and followed a few minutes later. They went into a dime store, chose a new dress for her and a shirt for him, then walked to the residential area. At a small gated home, they stopped and knocked. The man from the shop opened the door and hesitated when he saw Roux.
“Who is this with you, Ciara?”
“This is my husband, Roux.”
“Husband? You’ve not mentioned him before.”
“We are newlyweds. I met him three years ago, in our youth. We have just recently been able to be together again. Roux, this is Gavin.”
Gavin looked them over, and, satisfied with the explanation let them in and took them to the kitchen. He pulled a box from the freezer. Taking a key from behind the clock he opened it and retrieved an envelope. Ciara pulled one from her dress and they exchanged money for information. Gavin returned everything to its place and offered them tea.
“You, Roux, where are you from?”
“Tinara, a very small village. I doubt we exist on a map.”
“Just another stop on the river for us.” Ciara took Roux’s hand and smiled.
“You have a special girl for your wife. My Brittany has been gone for a year now. She looked at me like Ciara looks at you.”
Ciara blushed and looked down at her hands. Gavin and his wife had run her route before she did. When Brit became ill, Gavin had come down to the river to recruit the Rats to help. She had come to know them both well and was saddened when she heard Brit had passed. Ciara’s first assignment was dealing with Gavin and she considered him a special friend.
“Excuse me a moment.”
Gavin got up, leaving Roux and Ciara in the kitchen.
“Ciara?”
“Yes?”
“Why are we still here? The exchange has been made, shouldn’t we be leaving?”
“No. If we were in and out quickly, people would become suspicious. If we stay for a visit, people just think it is that, old friends passing through.”
“Ah...I see.”
Gavin returned to the kitchen with a small box that he handed to Ciara.
“Here.”
“What is this?”
“I noticed that you two have no rings. These were ours. I would consider it an honor if you wore them. Consider it my wedding gift.”
“Oh, Gavin. Thank you. I…we…are the ones who would be honored.”
She went over and hugged Gavin. Roux stood and shook his hand.
“That’s enough. I’ll get all teary now.”
Gavin laughed it off, but Ciara knew he was not one prone to open displays.
“We need to be heading back to camp now. You take care Gavin. We’ll see you again soon.”
On their way back, Ciara told Roux the story of Brit and Gavin and their covert work helping Jewish families pass through to safety, or delivering missives to agents. They did a small amount of traveling but as Brittany became weaker, they had to stop. They became a safe house, but as she continued to worsen, they could no longer hide the Jewish refugees. After she died Gavin continued to do the work they both felt so important.
“I see. Then I definitely will be honored to wear his ring. I had heard of people like them, the ones who risked their lives to help other, to hide the Jewish and fight Hitler’s horrors. I though they were all in Germany or Poland though.”
“Oh no. Hitler’s reach has extended far beyond those borders. There is talk that he may actually try to get to the America’s too. He already has people there that follow his beliefs. I fear that if America falls, that will be the end. .”
“I think so too. Mr. Churchill and Mr. Stalin have done their best, but the march across Europe will keep going until Hitler is dead. Even then, his teachings may go on.”
“That is one thing saddens me. Most people are accepting of us now, but more and more I see the fear in their eyes because we are different. It is something that has gone on since, well, since Cain and Abel, really. People are taught that differences are frightening.”
They finished the walk back to camp in silence and found dinner was being set out as they arrived. Roux went to put their purchases on the boat while Ciara went to talk with David. The money would be split among the families and spent the following day in the town buying food staples and supplies. Dinner was called and everyone lined up to fill their plates. After the first helping had been served, Roux stood and asked for everyone’s attention. Ciara wanted to slide under the table, but he pulled her up to stand next to him.
“First, I don’t think I have said an official thank you to you all for welcoming me into your family. I feel so very welcome and accepted. I thank you for that. Second is, that, with, well…whoever’s permission, I would like to take Ciara as my bride.”
Ciara felt her face flame as a cheer went through the diners. A crowd was around them, separating them. She caught his eye across the group of people and smiled. He looked overwhelmed at the response. The men approached him and pounded him on the pack, shook his hand and congratulated him.
“When will the wedding be?”
An expectant hush fell over the group. Ciara looked to Roux and he shrugged.
“Do it now! Do it now!”
A chant was taken up and soon all voices were calling for the wedding to be immediate. Ciara fought through the crowd to stand by Roux laughing at the Rats. David stepped up by them and quieted the crowd.
“Hey. Tell ya what. Let’s eat while the food is hot, and after all is done, we will marry these two.”
A cheer raced through and everyone took their seats. Ciara didn’t taste her food, what little she ate. She was a little surprised at how fast everything was now moving. Before she realized it, the women had taken her to Natalie’s boat and changed her outfit. Something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue all appeared for her to put on. As the last light of the day started to disappear, she was standing next to Roux, pledging her love.
Chapter Five
Roux
Meeting Gavin and hearing his story made Roux realize that time can be short. He didn’t want to wait to talk to David. As soon as everyone had their food and was seated, he stood. The cheer that ran through the gathering surprised him, and he was swept off in the tide of well wishes. Once David had said they’d do it after dinner, he lost track of what was going on. He ate, but couldn’t say what it had been. When the meal finished, he was ushered off to his bunk while they took Ciara to a different craft. Before he knew it, they were standing together on the bow of the main vessel, saying I do, exchanging the rings Gavin had given them and kissing to the cheers and tears of the River Rats. The dinner tables were still up, but now had wine and spirits, cheese, crackers and desserts. Musicians played and everyone gathered and danced around the fire. Even though they were now married, he saw little but glimpses of Ciara through the flames of the fire, as he was passed from woman to woman for a dance, while Ciara was doing the same with the men. Once all of the others had their chance, Roux and Ciara were allowed to be together while the others sat and watched them.
Roux looked at the face turned up to him, shadows from the flickering fire outside and in skipping over her face. He believed the stars had fallen into her eyes as she held his gaze. The music, the food and the people melted away as he tightened his arm about her waist and squeezed her hand.
“I don’t think I have ever felt as complete as I do at this moment, Ciara. I don’t ever want it to end.”
“Oh, Roux. Even though we were just kids when I first met you, you have been in my heart all along. How does that happen?”
“I don’t know. But I am happy it does, that it happened for us.”
He pulled her close and she rested her cheek on his chest. They stood swaying, lost in each other’s warmth until the applause broke in. Remembering they were more or less on display, he blushed and bent to kiss her before his new family. As his lips met hers the Rats broke out into more cheers. Roux laughed. He couldn’t get over how happy this group was, how they celebrated everything in life. The song had ended and he led his new bride to sit. They spent the rest of the evening relaxing and watching as the others drank and danced and ate. Roux watched them with a feeling he couldn’t find the words for. Ciara’s hand on his thigh stirred him from his thoughts. He looked at her and he could see she was ready to be alone as was he.
“Think they’ll miss us?”
Ciara smiled and shook her head. They crept away from the crowd and he started to head for the boat, but she pulled him off to the spot they had first met, the grassy bank by the river away from the camp.
“If they see we’ve gone, they’ll look for us in the boat. I want you all to myself right now.”
Ciara stretched up and kissed him. The evening was warm and he felt it infuse him as he met her mouth. Wrapping his arms around her, they sank to the ground. He kissed her, tasting the wine, feeling the heat of her mouth. Probing, she opened to him and gave him back what he was giving.
“Ciara, I love you.”
“I love you too, my husband.”
He kissed her again and let his hands roam over her sides to her hips. She leaned in and he felt his cock jump. Although he had never made love to a woman, he knew what was supposed to happen. PePaw had talked to him about it, and he had read the stories the other boys at school brought in from their father’s stashes. Like any other boy growing up, he had had wet dreams, and had masturbated. However familiar with those feeling he was, the adrenalin that rushed through his body sparked his sensitivity and his flesh felt like it were on fire. He let his palms caress her arms and legs, her flesh beneath his hands quivering.
“Ciara, this is…this is my first time.”
“Mine too.”
They kissed again and she moved to lay beneath him, urging him to lie with her. Her fingers moved over his body, hesitating at his crotch. She lay her hand there and flexed her fingers to cup him. He felt himself growing harder at her touch and drew in his breath. The sensation was exquisite. His mouth left hers and began to travel down her throat, to the opening of her blouse. She reached up to undo the buttons, revealing her breasts to the moonlight and his mouth. He kissed each one, becoming more excited as her nipples reacted to the wet and the heat of his mouth. A shiver ran through her body and he stopped.
“Are you cold?”
“No.”
Her hand coaxed his head back to her body and he continued his attentions. The more her suckled her breasts, the harder the nipples became. She arched her back towards him a sigh escaping her lips. His hard on grew with her nipples and he lifted himself up. She undid the fasteners on his trousers, her fingers winding inside to capture his cock. A moan escaped his mouth and he rested his cheek on her chest. He was trying to take it slow, to savor their first time, but as her hand began to stroke him, he began to rock. His hands found the hem of her dress and soon, she lay nude before him. She reached up and removed his shirt and helped him out of his pants until he was nude too. They sat on their knees, face to face taking each other in, absorbing the beauty of the other. Roux looked into her eyes and began to run his hand over her skin. There was no fear on her face. Her own hands stroked his chest down to his hips. She nudged him forward.
“Please, Roux. Make love to me now.”
He positioned himself between her legs, saying a prayer that he didn’t hurt her. He began to slide in, finding slight resistance. Her breath caught in her throat and a small sound escaped her lips. He stopped.
“No, Roux, do it. Don’t stop.”
Ciara’s hand was guiding him, pulling him forward. Following her lead, he pushed in, feeling the resistance give with her cry. Once inside he had to stop, the sensations overpowering him and threatening to spill out. His hips ached to thrust forward, finding a home inside her. He looked down and saw her face, her eyes locked on his.
“Please, Roux.”
Under control once again, he allowed his cock to slide all the way into her. She let her breath all out and gathered him close to her. They lay that way for a moment.
“Are you all right, Ciara?”
“I am wonderful. You feel, oh Roux.”
Roux could feel her inside, pulsing with her heart beat, muscles grabbing at him, igniting the drive in his hips. It matched the throbbing of his own body as he pulled back, then pushed in. Clutching her tight, he couldn’t stop the nature of his body and rocked faster and faster into her. Sounds of Ciara’s pleasure filled his ear, and he dropped his own in hers. He felt the growing urge, and he felt as if he were about to shatter into a million pieces. Fighting to control it, he heard her breathing change, the small sounds of pleasure growing louder.
“Ciara, oh God, so good…”
“Yes…Roux, do it, don’t stop, I-I…”
As she cried out to him with her orgasm, he let his control fall loose. Blinding heat seared his body and his mind, washing away everything but their bodies. The rhythm of his hips slowed, jerking as the last of their orgasms waned. They held each other waiting for their breathing to settle to normal. He closed his eyes and let the tingling in his body wash over him, the waves coming farther and farther apart. He lay down beside his wife, a flush enveloping him. This was what life was supposed to be.


Ciara
Ciara had heard the first time was painful. She wasn’t afraid of the pain, she wanted Roux to make love to her too much for that. It had been one small moment, and the rest was as magnificent as she had imagined. She kissed his cheek and watched as his eyes opened, the beautiful brown of his eyes shaded by his lashes. He smiled at her.
“That was remarkable. I have never felt anything so wonderful in my entire life.”
“I didn’t know that it would feel so good.”
She laughed at herself and blushed. In many ways, they were still shy with each other, the past few days being a jumble. Roux rolled over on his back and pulled her on top of him, his hands firm on her ass. He rubbed and squeezed the cheeks watching her.
“We should head back to camp. They’ll start to worry or come looking for us, and we really don’t want them to find us like this.”
She bent forward and kissed him. They dressed and made their way back only to find the only person still up was the fire tender for the night, Mikel. They slipped onto the boat and went to their cabin, undressing and slipping under the blankets.
“Let’s do it again, Roux. I want to feel your magic again.”
She reached over and found him, delighted to find he was already getting hard. Turning her back to him she bent down and brought his cock to her lips, kissing the tip. It tasted of both of their bodies, salty and sweet. She ran her tongue around the head, experimenting. Roux’s hands grasped her waist, his fingers curling in as she hit sensitive spot.
“Is that all right?”
“Oh, damn, Ciara.”
She brought her mouth to cover his cock, semi hard as she swallowed it. Sucking in, rolling her tongue around it, she felt it grow. Once, as a child, she had eaten a mussel. Instead of letting it slide down her throat, she tried chewing it and the more she chewed, the more it expanded. The sensation of his prick growing in her mouth reminded her of it, and she nicked the sides with her teeth. He jerked up at the action, and she smiled to herself. Grabbing the base, she let her mouth move up and down his shaft, letting her teeth close at different intervals. When she reached the head, she sucked harder, letting her tongue probe the opening. She continued the movement, up and down, feeling him grow. She was amazed at how excited she became knowing she was making the flesh of his cock grow taut. The sounds of his groans reached her and spurred her on. Roux pulled her away from his cock and turned her to sit on him. She lifted up and felt the tip probe her. The power of making him hard had also made her wet and he slid in with ease. Ciara pulled up Roux’s knees and braced herself against them moving her hips up and down his cock. His strong hands helped her to rise and fall, and she was once again lost in the pleasure of his prick inside her. She let him take control of the speed and movement, unable to do so herself. Breasts bouncing with the rhythm, her body moved of its own will, striving to bring about the rush of orgasm again, craving the pleasure, the heat. She felt almost incoherent, and realized the voice she was hearing was her own.
“Roux…”
“Shhhhh. Just let it ride.”
“God Roux. I can’t take this. Are you feeling like this?”
“Like what love.”
“Burning, electric, hot, shaky…”
“Yes.”
“Yes, Roux, that’s it. ”
“Hang on baby.”
He sat up, his arm encircling her waist bringing her closer to rub against him. He began making a grunting sound with each thrust, turning her on all the more.
“Yes. Yes. Yes. God Roux yes.”
“Ciara, my God. So tight, so warm.”
Words left them and only the animal sounds escaped as their orgasms moved them. Ciara followed as Roux fell back to the pillows, gasping for air.
“That was worth waiting for.”
She felt the rumble in his chest as he laughed.
“You said you wanted to make my nights different. I think you have achieved that.”
“Oh Roux. I love you so much.”
“I love you too.”
They lay in their embrace, warmed in the after glow for a few moments. Ciara looked up at the face of her husband. Every wish she had ever made, on a birthday cake, the first star, an errant dandelion fluff, had all come true tonight. She couldn’t, and wouldn’t, ask for anything more in her life than to be with Roux.

They slept late the next morning, and when they appeared on deck together, knowing looks followed them. The day was free, for walking, swimming, making love. They returned to the field from the night before and made love in the sunshine. Many of the Rats had gone to town for shopping so when they returned to camp it was almost deserted. They decided to return to the cabin and nap before dinner. No one interrupted them on their first full day as husband and wife. The magic that followed them had everyone in good humor.
Ciara sat on Roux’s lap by the fire that night, looking over the gathering. These were her people and her family. It was now a complete thing to her with Roux by her side. Nothing would harm these people as long as she drew breath. Tomorrow they would weigh anchor and be on their way again, back to their life. She had a lot of responsibilities, caring for this floating community. With Roux as her husband, she felt now nothing could stop her.

Chapter Six
Roux
Life had become a placid journey. Everything he had imagined it would be was coming true. They spent days on the water, and most nights near shore. Each stop brought new places and faces and people to meet, towns to explore. The whole world was his to discover. He and Ciara shared everything. She taught him to read the maps and navigate, and David taught him how to handle the boat. David was getting older and would be moving back to Cassie’s boat, leaving Roux as captain of this one. Summer closed and the trees of fall delighted Roux. He was awestruck by the beauty of the forests changing. As winter came on, they returned to what Ciara had told him was their winter camp. The rivers became too dangerous so for a couple of months they lived in a small shanty town. They could reach a few places from this location and stayed only a short time. Being in one spot for too long opened them to danger and suspicion. As soon as March arrived, they packed up and returned to life on the waters.
They found missions waiting for them every time they stopped. The war was escalating. As the year had drawn to a close, they heard the news of the attack on Pearl Harbor, the horrible scene, and the United States involvement in the war. Many thought that it would only be a short time now, since the American’s were involved. As 1942 went on, things seemed to become harder for the people in Europe. Bombings decimated towns, and many of the places they once docked were wiped out. Knowing that it was getting dangerous to stay in these waters, the decision was made to head towards France. While the war was just as bad there, they were not known to the people and could travel the waters there with little harassment. Spies were not treated well, most were simply killed when caught. They had worked these shores for years and the fear of being turned in by people who knew them was becoming real.
Gavin was gone from his village, and no one knew what had become of him. It broke Roux’s heart to see Ciara stand at his gate, crying. The were sure the Nazi’s had found him. It was decided then that they would have to curtail their work for a short time. There were children and families to consider, and bringing the war into their camp was not an option.
Despite the war news and the hardships, the life among the Rats was happy. Subtle and not so subtle hints were dropped about Roux and Ciara starting a family. They wanted one and tried, but had had no luck yet. Trying was the fun part. In each town they went to, they looked for and found books about sex. The Kama Sutra was added to their collection. They spent their nights reading the text, trying the things they read about. Pleasing each other became their favorite game, in their bedchamber and out. In some of the larger cities they visited, specialty shops were sought out for toys and apparatus designed to enhance lovemaking. They rushed back to camp laughing with their treasures. Both learned that nothing was off limits and if they thought of it, it was worth trying.
As much as he enjoyed the games, the simple act of making love to her was what he loved best. Like their first night, it was new to him every time. He tried to get her to come before him so he could bask in the look of pure joy on her face when she gave herself over to him. Nights found him buried between her legs, his mouth glued to her cunt, tasting all of her. His tongue had invaded her walls, thrusting like his cock. As she cried out and came, he would turn her over and enter her from behind, creating a multiple effect where one orgasm began before the first ended. If she was bleeding, they went into the river and made love, washing clean the traces. Nothing stopped them from their delights. Some of the nights he used his fingers to arouse her, finding her clit and working it to a tiny version of his erect cock. He loved to watch her face as she came, her eyes going dark, her mouth moving with soundless pleasure. When she knelt before him to suck his cock, he saw she enjoyed it as much as he did. He would never grow tired of the sensations she created in him.

Roux stood on deck one morning, breathing in the fresh morning air. Summer had arrived and everything was infused with color. The sound of the planes overhead was the only indication that the world was at war. Out here, it seemed perfect. Ciara arrived next to him with coffee.
“Good morning my love.”
He bent and kissed her, giving her breast a soft squeeze.
“How did you sleep?”
“I was worn out. I slept wonderfully.”
Breakfast was appearing on the tables and they moved to join the group. They’d be staying here for another day. The next stop was to be near Roux’s hometown. They would only make camp there on the way to a meeting place. A mission had come to them that only they could make; travel time over land was too long. Roux had taken over the boat with ease and he and Ciara spent the afternoon planning the route they would take. Germans were now present almost everywhere. Care had to be taken.
At dinner, Ciara leaned in to whisper in Roux’s ear.
“Tomorrow is one year since we came back for you, your birthday. I have a surprise for you tonight.”
Roux looked down into her face. Her eyes sparkled and she winked, returning her attention to the table. Roux felt the same reaction he always felt when he looked at her, his blood ran hot and he wanted her, now. If he had his way, they would never leave the bed. He had become quite addicted to her and to making love to her. No matter the game, how rough, how soft, it was always making love. He decided he would hurry along the clean up for the night, begging on an early leave in the morning. That way, he would get to her sooner.

Ciara
Ciara couldn’t wait for the night. She had discovered she was pregnant a few days earlier, but wanted to tell Roux on his birthday, the day he came to be with them. Their anniversary was only a few days after, so they would have extra to celebrate. She made off to their cabin as the last of the things were secured for the morning, bathing, lighting candles, and putting on his favorite of her negligees. It was cream colored, sheer and hung to her knees. Loose fitting, her breasts held it out from her body, her nipples rubbing on the fine fabric. She positioned herself on the bed as she heard Roux coming. He opened the door and let out a whistle. He had bathed in the river and his hair hung free, damp against his face.
“How do you do that?”
“What?”
“Look more beautiful and more exciting each time I see you.”
He rushed to her and caught her in his arms, laying kisses over her. Fire burned in him and he bent to take her nipple in his mouth through the fabric. The sucking made the material rub against it and she felt the skin tighten as it rode to his mouth. His hand found its way under the garment and between her legs. Ciara moaned and lay back letting him work. Her control left when he started on her. Giving over to his ministrations sent her to ecstasy. She felt his fingers, rough from work as they stroked the velvet skin, probing to her cunt. A small sound escaped her. He stood and stripped and she watched the candlelight as it poured over his skin, his cock half erect. She wanted him so much when he stood like that.
“Come her, Roux. Let me suck your cock for you.”
“Only if I get to do the same for you.”
He lay on top of her, his mouth taking hers, Their passion moved them and they kissed and licked and sucked each other’s mouths, hungry and wanton. Their hands roamed, feeling every inch of skin. Sweat formed a small layer of film on them and Roux turned on the bed, waiting for Ciara to get in position. She lay on her back as he brought his cock to her lips where she puckered and drew him in slowly, wetting him with her saliva. He slid all the way in, then back and she grasped his base, holding him in place so she could be in charge of the movements. His head bent to her and he placed a kiss on her clit, sliding his hands under her thighs, spreading her legs to get at her cunt. He took long strokes with his tongue, flicking the nub when he reached it, causing her to jerk each time. He was so skilled at eating her, she had a hard time concentrating on the growing hard-on in her mouth. With a gentle shove they were side by side on the bed, a perfect 69. She could move her head more and devoured him, sucking at the prick. She could feel him twitching, moving aching to fuck her face. She released him from her mouth and continued with her fist. She had only one regret when they did this, they couldn’t talk. The moans and grunts excited her, but she loved to hear him talk dirty to her, and she loved to give it back even more.
“Roux, yes, eat me. Use that tongue, use your fingers. In me. In my ass Roux.”
She felt his tongue leave her pussy and slide over the crack of her ass, wetting it for his fingers. As he slid one in, he returned to her cunt. She rolled to her back and pulled her legs open, holding herself up for him to reach. He finger fucked her ass for a few minutes then moved to grab a dildo from the bedside table. She lay panting, waiting for what was to come. Roux lay down again next to her and pulled her on top of him. He spread her ass cheeks, placing the tip of the rubber dick at her hole. Slow and careful, he let it slide in.
“OooooooooOOOOHHHHH!”
Once buried, he moved it around, in and out, fucking her ass with it. How good it felt there. She brought herself up on all fours and rocked back against the action of his hand. Roux leaned up and in, catching her breast in his mouth, biting the nipple.
“YES. Hurt me Roux, Don’t be afraid.”
He grabbed her other nipple with his free hand and pinched it, twisting it.
“AAAAAH. YES YES YES!”
He left go of the nipple and grabbed the base of his cock, standing it up. Letting the movement of the dildo stop, he used his other hand to bring her cunt to the head of his cock. Once the head was in, he went back to the dildo. She tried to hold still unsure of what he was doing. This was something new. She felt him slide the contraption back so that it was just in her very end. She looked into his eyes and saw the love there, the anticipation. His mouth continued on her breast, sucking hard. Since she was holding the head of his cock in her, his hand returned to the free nipple, his thumb and two fingers grasping it. Without warning, in a simultaneous moment, he bit one nipple, pinched the other with a sharp twist, shoved both his cock and the dildo into her hard. She screamed at the overpowering sensation it created, not knowing which thing was the most exquisite. He pumped her ass fast, and she matched the speed and force with his cock. Every movement was painful pleasure. He had a firm hold on both nipples and every time she pulled up his shaft they were stretched.
“Oh my god, Roux, fuck me hard with that thing. Yes don’t stop don’t let it end!”
“Cum Ciara, come all over my cock. Let that ass cum too. Get off , baby. Cum.”
She felt it begin in her stomach, radiating out to her limbs. The most primal of all sensations welled up in her and she gave her body and mind over to the overwhelming electric sensation of her orgasm. She reared up against in, pounding herself up and down as it rocked her. Her movements slowed and she dropped to sprawl against Roux’s chest. He had not cum and his hard cock stayed inside of her as she lay dazed, her body trembling.
“Roux?”
“Yes my love.”
“That was phenomenal.”
“Hold on baby, it’s only gonna get better.”






Chapter Seven
Roux
He felt her chest heaving against him as she rode the last of her orgasm out. When she was ready, he rolled her onto her back and entered her again. A moan escaped her. He loved to fuck her like this. No extras, no games. Just pure soft love. The games were always fun and he always ejaculated, but being able to see her face, to give her the most tender of times made his love well up in his heart. It didn’t take him long to bring her off again and this time, he came with her. Exhausted, they lay together listening to the night.
“Roux?”
“Yes love.”
“I still haven’t given you your surprise.”
“Hmmmm?”
He was confused. He had thought that was it, although it wasn’t a surprise for him.
“Roux, I am pregnant. You’re going to be a daddy.”
“What? Oh, Ciara, you aren’t kidding?”
“No, darling. We are going to have a baby.”
He let out a whoop and all of his energy returned. Jumping from the bed he ran to the window and threw it open, yelling to the night.
“I’m gonna be a daddy!!”
Congratulations were shouted from the other boats and he returned to Ciara’s side.
“Wait. What we just did, all of that, it…”
“It was just fine. We can continue to have sex for a while yet without harming the baby.”
The baby. His baby. Their baby! He danced round the room and pulled Ciara up to join him. Holding her close he whispered in her ear.
“You have made me so happy. What a surprise, what a gift!”
“Then I take it you are happy?”
“How could I not be? Only the day I married you was better.”
He kissed her and put her back to bed. His movements were careful as he crawled in beside her.
“I will not break Roux. No need to be so ginger.”
“I don’t want to ruin the magic.”
She snuggled down against his shoulder and he wrapped his arms around her. They fell asleep, dreaming of the future. Roux’s mind raced over names, boy or girl, all of the possibilities and he dreamed of a large family.

As they arrived at breakfast the next morning applause and congratulations greeted them. The men acted as if Roux had just returned from battle and slayed the enemy. The men praised his prowess as a man and he found their reaction funny and let them have their jokes. It was all jesting in fun. The women had enthroned Ciara and were running to fetch things for her, treating her like a princess. He could tell by the look on her face that she hated it and was trying to make them stop. Soon enough everyone settled down and they were off to the shore near Tinara. Roux was a little anxious to return. He had not left on bad terms and wondered what the past year had brought to his old home. They reached the area in the late afternoon and he left Ciara to oversee the set up. He could move faster without her and wanted to check things out before he let anyone else go in.
The town remained untouched. A little poorer perhaps. He walked to the tanner’s to visit his old boss, and stopped at the grocery for a treat for Ciara. As he left he saw a familiar figure across the street. He ran over and approached the man.
“Gavin?”
He stopped short and looked up in surprise.
“Roux? By God it is you.”
Gavin had lost weight and looked tired. His hands shook when he grasped Roux’s.
“What the hell happened to you man?”
“Not here, son. Spies abound. I live at the church boarding house, we can talk there.”
It turned out that the boarding house was his old home. It felt strange walking in, as if he had never lived here at all, yet it was familiar. Gavin led him to his room and shut the door.
“Gavin?”
“I had to leave the other town. The Nazi’s found out what I was doing. They tried to get me to tell who was running the documents, but I wouldn’t tell them. They tortured me for days, but I wouldn’t give in. One night I escaped. I remembered the name of this town and came to see if you were here. The church took me in and I have been here since, hoping you would someday return.”
“Gavin, they tortured you?”
“Please, I don’t want to remember it,”
“Ciara will be so relieved to know I found you. I know she’ll want to see you.”
“No! She must not come here. They have been looking for you all. They had pictures of Ciara coming to my house they know who she is.”
A sick knot formed in Roux’s stomach. They knew who she was. They were looking for her, for them.
“I have put you in danger haven’t I Gavin? By coming here?”
“No, they don’t know who you are and this is your hometown. They won’t suspect you.”
“Come back with me Gavin. We can keep you safe. Get your things.”
“I can’t Roux. I am dying. I don’t have much longer. They have spies in town that watch me, that are waiting for Ciara to come make contact. If I go with you, they’ll follow and surely kill you all.”
Ice ran in Roux’s veins as he listened. He sat with Gavin for a while, told him of the baby, and discussed inane things to try to ease the old man’s mind. When the time came for him to leave, he hugged the man.
“You give Ciara all my love, will you? I won’t see you again. Take care of her and that baby.”
Roux left and headed out of town, taking a route through some woods to have the time to think and to keep anyone from following. He imagined noises and watched for anything suspicious. The cold hand of fear gripped his heart as he realized how much danger they were in. Ciara was known to the Nazis. They had her picture and were trying to find her. He had to tell her and find a way to get out of the area. It was no longer a safe country to be in.
He broke through the trees and looked to his family of Rats below. There wasn’t a one he wouldn’t fight for. Searching, he found his wife sitting on the deck waiting for him. She saw the direction he came from and got up to greet him. His heart heavy, he knew that he was about to spoil the joyful day they had had.

Ciara
He would be back anytime now. No one would let her help set dinner, so she sat on the deck scanning the knoll for Roux’s return. A small part of her was afraid he wouldn’t come back, that he would decide that he no longer wanted to be with them She knew it was silly, she knew it was nonsense, she knew it was hormones. But it still felt very real to her. When she spied him coming through the trees on the other side of camp, she felt relief and puzzlement. Why was he coming from that direction? It was no where near the town. He broke into a run and was gathering her in his arms within seconds. She was surprised at the force of his embrace.
“Roux, what is it, what’s wrong?”
He refused to release her or answer her right away, just held on to her. A fear crept up into her spine.
“Tell me, what happened?”
Roux let her go and looked into her face. She saw the marks the tears had left,
“You’ve been crying. The town? Was it there?”
He nodded and took her hand, leading her to their cabin. Once seated, he told her of seeing Gavin, and all he had told her. Ciara began to cry at the news he was tortured on her behalf, and stood, intending to go find him.
“No, Ciara. They are hunting for you. If you go to him, they will find you and kill you, and everyone in the camp. You can’t go.”
“But Gavin is there, alone…”
“He is being well cared for. The church that I gave my house to has a boarding house set up and he is living there. There are spies in the town though, and they watch him, waiting for you to come.”
“Then we’ll get him tonight, sneak him out like he snuck away before.”
“Ciara, he is sick. He is dying. He does not want to come with us.”
Frustration, anger and fear welled up in Ciara. She felt a flush crawl over her shoulders and up her neck and the room started to tilt. She watched as Roux’s mouth moved but didn’t hear his words. He became fuzzy and she tried to shake her head to clear her vision. The room was swaying and she could see the alarm cross Roux’s face and his movements as he dashed forward seemed slow motion. The room went gray, then black.

Ciara opened her eyes against the light, blinking to focus her vision. Natalie was sitting beside her, wringing a rag to place on her forehead. She saw Roux standing in the corner, shoulders slumped in, face as white as the sheets. She tried a weak smile.
“Hey mister.”
Roux ran to the foot of the bed.
“Oh god you scared me Ciara. Are you all right.”
“Yes. I-I think so. What happened?”
“Ya fainted dearie. Got yerself all worked up. Ya cain’t be doin that.”
Natalie took the rag and held it out to Roux, standing. He took it and sat on the bed beside her, stroking the cool cloth across her brow. His eyes were a web of fear, sadness and concern. She remembered what they had been talking about before she fainted. The news Roux had brought back was so horrid. Tears pricked her eyes for Gavin.
“Ciara what’s wrong. Does something hurt?”
“No. Just thinking of Gavin.”
“I’ll go get you two something light to eat. It’s been a hard day for you both.”
Natalie patted Roux’s shoulder and left them alone. Roux gathered Ciara up in his arms as her tears began to fall harder. She buried her face in his chest and sobbed. Her dear friend Gavin had been tortured on her behalf. Knowing it was her fault burned at her. Her anger at Hitler and the Nazis and their methods made her cry harder. She had thought that what they were doing was making a difference, but when it hit someone so close to her, she wondered. Roux had said he was safe, but dying. Her heart ached to go see him and comfort him, but knew that it wouldn’t be wise.
As her thoughts wound down her crying eased. Roux was stroking her hair, making small sounds trying to soothe her. Once spent she lay back and looked up at his face, worry drawing lines around his mouth. The color was gone from his face and she felt guilty.
“Oh Roux. Please don’t look like that.”
“Like what.”
“Your face is gray, and you look so worried. I don’t like it.”
“Don’t you fret over it. I am fine. I am just concerned about you.”
“I’ll be all right. I’m scared though, for Gavin.”
“You needn’t worry for him. He will be all right. What we need to do is figure out what to do about you and the Nazi’s.”
“Me?”
“Ciara, they know what you look like. If we continue with the deliveries, they will surely catch you and kill you. I-I don’t know if I could stand that.”
“They won’t catch us. I won’t allow it. We only have this last one here, then we are leaving the country.”
“You have to think about the Rats, Ciara. If they catch you they’ll surely catch us all. And the baby. What about that?”
“What am I supposed to do?”
“Stay here on the boat. Out of site. We’re preparing to weigh anchor at first light and get the hell away from here.”
“But, what about the papers? We have a job we have to get those documents out.”
“Mikel and I will make it. We can’t chance you going out.”
“But, I have to do it Roux. The Miller’s don’t know anyone but me.”
“Ciara, in your condition and with this new knowledge, …”
“No, my final word. You and Mikel can go with me, but I have to go. I promise, after this, I will be done.”
She set her jaw and looked at him. The fear pounding in her heart was nothing compared to her sense of duty. She had taken on this one last job and she would see it through. No one would make her fail in her mission. There was a dark cloud on Roux’s face as she squared off with him. He sighed and squeezed her hand.
“All right. I don’t like it, but all right.”
She smiled in relief. All she had to do was keep up her bravado until it was done, keep her confidence. If he thought she was having second thoughts at all, he would make her stay.

Chapter Eight
Roux
Roux was overwhelmed as Ciara lay in his arms crying. His own tears pricked his eyes. He had not cried with her or experienced the raw, feral feeling he had now. The protective rage that grew in him was foreign to him and he wanted to strike out at the world and make it stop hurting her. At a loss for how to make it better, all he could do was hold her close as she cried it out. He felt her sobs slow, and the crying ceased. He tried to ease her feelings, to get her to settle down, but she became upset again at the talk of not running her last mission. Roux looked at her. The set of her jaw was hard and stubborn. Her eyes had ice in them, daring him to tell her no. They hadn’t fought about anything, and he didn’t want to start.
“All right. I don’t like it, but all right.”

The next morning the Rats were on the move as the sun came up. Roux took the helm and let Ciara sleep. The day before had taken a toll on her. She still looked pale in the early light, small, dark smudges under her eyes. He had been exhausted and for the first time in their marriage, they fell asleep without making love. His sleep had been fitful, nightmares haunting him. After waking for the fifth time, he sat in a chair and watched her sleep. She seemed to be having nightmares as well, tossing and mumbling. He crawled back in beside her and wrapped his arms around her, and she calmed down. As the very first steaks of light appeared he left her there and went to get the caravan moving. After they were well on their way on a smooth straight stretch, he went to check on her. Ciara wasn’t in the bed and he could hear she was in the small bathroom, being sick. The tingle of fear at the noise crawled up his arms and he went to her.
“Ciara, are you all right?”
“Yes, it’s just morning sickness. I can feel the water moving the boat.”
He led her back to bed.
“Would something to eat help?”
“No. I’ll be all right in a bit.”
“You just stay in here today and rest. I’ll feel better anyway. If they got wind of us in Tinara, the Nazi’s will be watching from shore. As long as you don’t come up deck, they won’t see you.”
“All right.”
Roux stayed with her until she went back to sleep. Returning to the wheelhouse, he scanned the shores. Everyone had been told to keep watch for anything suspicious. If there was the slightest indication that any thing out of the ordinary was going on, they would abort the delivery. So far, it was calm. He hoped they had left early enough to avoid any problems.
They glided on for the day. The decision had been made to travel through the night. Each boat got a night watch aboard. Mikel joined Roux and Ciara for dinner then took over so Roux could get some rest. No lights were to be lit, nothing to draw attention. The usual sounds of people calling from boat to boat, the laughter and sounds of children at play quieted. There was a serious pall over the caravan, the weight of their plight heavier than any anchor. Knowing Ciara, and by default all of them, were in danger had everyone on their guard.
Roux sat in the chair, lost on his thoughts. He had checked on Ciara though the day and she was looking better. She hated to be confined, he knew that, but did as she was asked. She had tidied the cabin and was learning to knit during the day, but since they couldn’t have any light, she had gone to sleep. Moonlight filtered through the sheer curtains, giving him just enough light to see her. The feelings he had for her were multiplied now; she carried his child and their future. He thought back to the day he first saw her in the field, a young boy of almost 15. She had been the first to stir the adrenalin in his body. At the time, he didn’t know what it was, but it had excited him. As he grew older and learned that it was the stirrings of sexual desire, he wanted her more. Once he joined her and made love to her, it continued to grow, becoming a constant feeling in his life. To think that it could all go away frightened him. He asked God to watch over them and make their drop a safe one.
She stirred in her sleep, rolling to her side. Her lips were parted. He wanted to go to her, take her in his arms and love her, but knew the sounds they would make would draw attention. Instead, he watched her, until his eyes grew heavy and he fell asleep in the chair.

The trip to the next drop site took two days on the river. They arrived before noon and weighed anchor. There had been no signs of activity as they had traveled, and an uneasy relief set on the group. No fires were lit, but everyone was allowed to go ashore to stretch out and get some exercise. Roux, Mikel and Ciara were preparing to leave. They decided to put Ciara in a wig to try to disguise her, just in case. David and Cassie were on hand with last minute instructions. The trio set out up the path, a picnic basket in tow. Anyone coming across them in the field would think them three friends on a picnic for the day. As they came upon the town, Roux heard Ciara suck in her breath, and Mikel uttered a small prayer.
The town stores were rubble. People milled around, shopping at open air stands that had taken their places. The look of shock and weariness was on the faces of the people. Ciara clutched Roux’s arm as they made their way through, stopping to look at some things, trying to appear casual. Turning off the main street they arrived at a residential section. The buildings here were standing, but not much more than that. Debris littered the streets and sidewalks and their trio picked their way over the piles of materials. Ciara stopped the men.
“That is the Miller’s house ahead. Wait here for me.”
“Ciara, I...”
“No. They’ll not come out if you are with me.”
She gave him a kiss on the cheek and walked to the house. Mikel and Roux stepped off and sat on a curb, waiting for her to come back. Emaciated dogs ran by, then stopped, smelling the food in the basket. The men fed them some bread and the dogs seemed happy to run off with their find. No children played in the yards here. The feeling of overwhelming depression was palpable. Roux heard foot steps and looked to Ciara returning. She had her arms folded, hugging herself as if she were freezing, her shawl drawn tight. Her face was drawn and white and she hollered at them as she approached.
“We have to go. Now!”
The men jumped up and they took off heading back the way they came. The usual routine of drawing the visit out to avoid suspicion was abandoned with the urge to make haste and get out. Once at the field away from town, they tossed the basket into some bushes and started to run. Roux held Ciara’s hand free hand, coaxing her along. He could see she was running out of power and they stopped.
“I’m sorry. I can’t…”
She was gasping for air and there was pain on her face. She dropped to her knees and Roux fell beside her. She was still hugging the shawl tight and he had to pull her hands free. There was blood all over her arm.
“Ciara!”
“It’s nothing, a flesh wound.”
“Jesus Christ! You’ve been shot! Why the hell didn’t you say something before we left town.”
“We…we had to leave. The Miller’s turned us in for reward money. The couple in the house wasn’t them. As soon as I realized it, I ran from the room. They chased me through the house and just as I left one of them fired at me. It just got my arm…I-I-I”
She passed out before finishing her sentence. Roux scooped her up and he and Mikel ran all the way back to the boats with her. As the camp came into view Mikel ran ahead shouting.
“Weigh anchor! We’ve been made!”
He ran to David and sent him up to meet Roux. Roux would not release Ciara. He was fighting back his tears. Once on the boat he lay her in the bed, revealing the blood covering his shirt and her arm. Natalie was fetched and while Ciara was passed out, she pulled a bullet from the flesh in the underside of her upper arm. Roux stood back watching, tears streaming from his eyes now. When he heard the sound of Natalie digging in the flesh for the bullet, his stomach heaved. As she drew the projectile out, he fainted.


Ciara
Ciara woke in a cold sweat. She had had a nightmare that the Nazi’s had found them and they were torturing Roux. As she turned over to look at him she felt the instant pain of her wound. It all came flooding back to her, the realization she had been set up, sold out, hiding in the house, trying to get out. The couple there weren’t familiar with the layout, or the secret panels and she made it to the front door before they spotted her. As she ran out, she felt the hot pain of the bullet hitting her but didn’t dare stop. All she could think of was getting back to Roux.
She looked at him lying next to her. His face was relaxed. He had grown a moustache in the past year and his skin was tanned dark. His blond hair was free from it’s usual tie back plait and was spread on the pillow beneath his head, a small lock over his eye. He looked like he did as a boy four years ago. His strong hands lay on his chest, twitching as he dreamt. Ciara brushed the hair from his eyes and stroked his cheek with the back of her hand, quieting his hands and her heart.
“He fainted.”
Ciara turned at Natalie’s voice. Here she was again, her nursemaid.
“He did?”
“Yup. I pulled the bullet out of your arm and he dropped like a sack of onions.”
Ciara suppressed a giggle, feeling bad for it. It touched her heart to know he had fainted.
“How long?”
“Eh, bout half an hour or so. King put him on the bed. Poor boy was exhausted. He ran back carrying you.”
“Oh my.”
“Yup. Now that I know you are awake, I’ll get something for you to eat. David got us underway as soon as you got back, Mikel has the helm now.”
“Okay. Thanks.”
Natalie left the cabin and Ciara returned her attention to Roux sleeping beside her. Her darling Roux, fainting. She smiled down at him. His eyes fluttered, then opened looking up at her.
“Ciara?”
“Yes, babe.”
He sat bolt upright and looked at her. His eyes were wild. He took her face in his hands and searched them.
“Oh, god, you’re all right.”
“Yes. It hurts but I am all right. How are you?”
“Foggy.”
He dropped back against the pillow.
“You fainted.”
“I did not.”
“Oh yes you did. Natalie told me as soon as she got the bullet you hit the floor.”
“How embarrassing.”
“It is not. It’s sweet.”
“How did I get here?”
“King put you in bed. We are on our way. David got the boats on the way.”
“Good. Some leader I make, huh?”
“I think they’ll forgive you for it.”
Ciara lay back down and snuggled up against him, her wounded arm upon his chest. She felt his hands on the bandage.
“I knew I shouldn’t have let you go alone.”
“Roux, it wouldn’t have changed things, except for the worse. They could have killed you. I had an advantage and got out.”
“But you got shot!”
“I am fine. It will heal. Natalie is getting us some dinner, and Mikel has the boat in hand. Let’s just relax tonight until you have to take over. We are on our way to France, and a whole new life.”

Chapter Nine
Roux

They traveled south for days, heading for the channel and France. It was decided that the crossing between Dover and Calais would be the shortest and safest. Brief stops were made for supplies, gasoline for the engines and foodstuffs. France was hit hard with the occupation and everyday items were hard to come by. If nothing else, the cargo in the holds could be bartered or used to help others. The Rats had no plan once they landed, but knew staying in England was not an option any longer.
Roux stood watching the waters as they closed in on Dover. Ciara’s arm was healing and she would only have a small scar. She insisted on keeping the destroyed bullet as a reminder. He decided once he had the chance, he would make it into a bracelet for her. She spent her days in the cabin or resting on deck where he could watch her. Every morning she was sick, but it passed and she was fine the rest of the day. It scared him, but all of the women assured the new daddy it was a normal part of pregnancy. He doted on her when he wasn’t at the helm or plotting course, giving in to her every request. As soon as her arm stopped to hurt her, they made careful love. He didn’t want to hurt her or the baby, and it was sweet and simple. They learned to be quiet as they made love, so as not to disturb Mikel in the bunk cabin or the other boats. Life had a subdued pallor, as if everyone were holding their breath until they crossed the channel.
They made port just outside of Dover and a group was dispatched to get the last of the supplies in town. Roux met with all of the captains to chart a plan for the crossing. It was a 25 mile stretch, and they could do it in a few hours. Tow ropes would be tied between each vessel. They had enough fuel to make the crossing and not have to worry. It was the primary concern, getting to the other side. German patrol boats were all around, though few were in the area they planned to cross. In the morning they would start for the shore, make a camp for the night and leave the following day. As sad as they were to be leaving home, the excitement of new waters had everyone in restrained gaiety.

“Ciara, are you ready? We’re getting ready to leave now.”
Ciara was standing staring at the cliffs. She had told Roux the night before she had never been to Dover and was awestruck by the beauty of the cliffs. He watched as she took a last look and made her way to the boat.
“I’m ready. Let’s get going.”
He helped her aboard and got her settled in a chair next to him in the wheel house. He gave the signal and waited to hear the others. Once everyone signaled they were ready, he turned the engine and started out to the channel. Mikel was on bow, watching for signs of any other ships. The day was sunny and calm, and soon they were halfway across. Roux could hear Ciara crying a little behind him. She was leaving the home she loved and felt like she was abandoning everyone there. He reached over and took her hand, giving it a little squeeze. She smiled up at him.
“I think I am going to go below decks and nap.”
“Good idea. You were up early.”
She kissed him and disappeared. He watched the waters and was pleased to see things were clear. The course was straight and they would land near Calais well before nightfall. He felt some of the stress he had been carrying leave him as he realized he had gotten the Rats out of danger. In the few places they had stopped along the way, he heard the stories of the Nazi’s hunting the resistance. The sounds of their aircraft overhead bombing at random broke their nights. He expected to hear the same over in France, but he didn’t fear being hunted. Maybe he was holding a false hope with that, but he had to believe they could make a life there.
“Land HO!”
Mikel made the call as soon as the shore came into view. There was a good hour yet till they would reach the shore. Roux checked his bearings and adjusted his course to meet the small inlet they would travel into. They would make camp as the sun set. Until they knew what the climate was in Calais, they would maintain their covert moves. Summer was winding down and they would have to find a safe place to make their winter home. Sighing with a mixture of sadness and relief, Roux turned the helm over to Mikel and went below to wake Ciara.

Ciara

She heard Mikel’s call of land ho and her stomach fluttered. It was all a little scary to her now. A new land, new people, a new life. The places she had been all her life knew her and the Rats. They welcomed them in and enjoyed seeing them. Here with the occupation, she feared the people would not be as welcoming. The feeling that the end of an era was upon them wouldn’t leave her. She remembered all too well the feeling of being an outcast, looked at as being less than a human. Her hope was that the people here would not be that way, since that was what they were fighting for, everyone’s right to be. Wasn’t Hitler doing just that? Exterminating a people because he thought them inferior? She prayed that hypocrisy was in short supply.
Roux stepped into the cabin and she could already see the relief on his face. He had shouldered the burden of evacuating the Rats. He wouldn’t talk to her of his concerns, not wanting to upset her, but she could see it in his eyes, feel it in the tight muscles in his neck and shoulders, and hear it when he talked in his sleep. She had kept her own worries to herself, knowing the state he would get himself into if he thought she was upset. It was a choreographed dance, with both partners watching their step, following a lead neither could set. His worries were over, and hers were coming up.
“How long before we reach the inlet?”
“Not long now. Maybe an hour. We’ll get inland a ways and make camp. I’ll send someone out for recon in the morning.”
He flopped down in the chair and she went to sit on his lap, encircling his shoulders with her arms. Placing a kiss on his temple she smiled.
“Thank you.”
“For?”
“Getting us here safely.”
He smiled a tired smile at her.
“No choice. I just hope it was right and we are safe here.”
“We will be.”

The next afternoon the scouts returned. The news was about the same as it had been at home. Germans were all over the area, spread out. Towns were bombed out but life went on. Most of the troops were inland, with a few along the coast. They were far enough in that it seemed they had found a safe pocket. Most of the people the scouts spoke with told them the Germans avoided the inland waterways since there was little chance of anyone making their way through them in ships. Most commerce was allowed to continue as much as it could.
Ciara decided it would be best for the Rats to lay low, and if any Germans came around, they would be a simple family group who had left England looking for better waters. She didn’t believe they would be questioned. Within days they found an ideal spot for winter camp and the decision was made to put in and set up. August was on them now and soon fall and winter. Perhaps by then, the war would have turned.
Boats were moored, and semi permanent structures went up. Most would sleep on their boats, but community storage units were needed for the supplies. There was a small strip of sandy beach, then a tree line about 50 yards off the waters, leading to a woods. Wild game was abundant and the waters provided fish. The area was well shaded and provided ample room for the children to play and everyone to have a space of their own. Everyone settled in as their natural canopy began to change colors in preparation for the winter.

Ciara was growing large. At six months into her pregnancy, she was waddling and found she needed to rest more often that she expected. She felt good, though, and was busy laying in clothes and blankets and things for the baby. All the women had their opinions on the gender and gave her hand me downs from their own children. She spent most afternoons on the deck, watching over the waters. She missed the constant travel and couldn’t wait until the spring, when her child would be here and they could pull up stakes and venture in to see more of the country.
Children from the other boats ran and played. Next to their boat was Yolanda and Carl, and they had a small girl, Kathy. Kathy was about two years old and always curious. Ciara looked up from her book and saw her playing with her dolls. She hoped that their child would be a girl, but knew no matter what it was, they would love it. Roux was repairing lines and nets behind her. She turned to watch him work for a bit, her pride in her husband warming her.
Once they could no longer make love, a new level came into their marriage. They still could get each other off, but the importance of sex in their marriage had dropped. Now, it was the future, dreams and hopes, their child and children to be. He took care of everything for her. She loved to watch as he played with the children, laying in experience for his own. They climbed all over him, getting horsy rides on his back and shoulders, tackling him to the ground to wrestle. He would spend time with the girls at tea parties or jumping rope. That made Ciara laugh the most watching him try to make himself small enough so the girls could swing the ropes over his head. At night they would settle in, with books or crafts, Roux playing Angel. He had the time to play her now, and Ciara loved to watch as his fingers moved over the strings. A soft look crossed his face when he played, as if the music took him away. She only hoped that where ever it took him, she was there too.
She turned her attention back to her book when she heard a splash. Looking up, she tried to locate Kathy. The little girl was no longer on the other boat and Ciara stood and ran to the rail. She could see where the child had fallen in and climbed the rail, diving in to get her. She heard Roux’s shout behind her, trying to stop her, but ignored it, fearing the worst for the girl. Underwater, she swam towards where she spotted her, and felt around. The water wasn’t too deep, but for a small child it was a death trap. Feeling a leg, she pulled the baby to her and lifted her to the surface. Kathy struggled in fear against her, making it hard for Ciara to get her had out of the water. Her own breath was going and she started to panic that she would not be able to save the child. She felt the weight of Kathy leave her hands and she tried to yell, thinking a current grabbed her. Splashing and struggling, her extra bulk making swimming difficult she began taking in water. She started to sink towards the bottom as the strong hands grasped her under her arms and pulled her out. She blacked out as her head broke the surface.

Chapter Ten
Roux

He heard the sounds of her jumping up and running and shouted at her. She was over the rail before he could stop her. Shouting to Yolanda and Carl that Kathy had fallen in, they all went into the water. They could see Ciara struggling with the frightened child and moved to help. Carl grabbed Kathy and took her to shore. Roux was screaming in panic for Ciara, the waters muddied and hard to look into. He felt the float of her dress on his leg and reached down pulling her up. She wasn’t breathing and he dragged her to shore. Kathy was fine, crying and hugging her Daddy. Ciara wasn’t and was turning blue. Roux turned her on her side and cleared her mouth, then on her back. He began to breath into her mouth, trying to breath her awake. She started to cough and he sat back, turning her on her side to expel the water and, following it, vomit. She lay there, not conscious, retching and breathing. When the spasms stopped he rushed her to the boat.
“Yolanda, get Natalie and Cassie! FAST!”
He stripped her wet clothes off and put her in the bed, piling blankets on her. The color was coming back to her lips, but her skin was cold. He tried to warm her limbs.
“Roux! Get out of those clothes before you get sick. Get dressed in something warm and dry and get under the blankets to help warm her.”
He did as he was told and soon had her in his arms. Her limp body next to him sent terror shooting through his heart. Not now, not after surviving the Nazi’s. She began to shake in his arms, as if ice were in her. He pulled her closer and whispered in her ear. He had no idea what he was saying, and he stayed like that for hours, falling into an exhausted sleep.
Hours later he woke up. Ciara was warm again and still next to him. Cassie was in the chair.
“Has she woken?”
“No. Its probably for the best right now. Go eat.”
“I can’t eat.”
“You have to Roux. There is nothing to be done right now. We just have to wait and see how she does. You can’t make her better by making yourself sick.”
He left the cabin, but didn’t go to eat. The sun had set and he leaned in the darkness against the rail. Why hadn’t he moved faster to stop her? There was a split second he hesitated, he could have caught her. Now she was unconscious. He took a knee at the rail and prayed, feeling his words were getting lost in the darkness. Tears ran down his cheeks as the fear of losing his world collapsed around him. He could hear thunder in the distance and it sounded like an angry voice, telling him no.

David found him still at the rail. It had started to rain and the storm was about to break over them. Helping the young man up, they went to the bunk cabin and David put him to bed. Ciara didn’t stir in the night, and Roux lay motionless in the bunk, afraid to do anything. As the sun came up and lit the cabin, David came to him with coffee.
“Come on, son. We need to go to your cabin.”
“Ciara?”
“Waking, but its not all good.”
Roux dashed from the bunk cabin and stopped at the door to his own. Natalie and Cassie were on both sides of Ciara, holding her hands. Sweat covered her face and her breathing was hard.
“Cassie?”
“She’s gone into early labor Roux. I am afraid she is going to lose the baby.”
“Roux?”
He heard her weak voice call to him and he moved to her. Cassie let him sit in her spot while she went to get towels.
“Hey, beautiful girl.”
“Roux, something’s wrong. The baby…”
“You just try to relax. Natalie and Cassie are here to help you.”
She began to cry.
“I’m sorry Roux.”
“No, you don’t be sorry. You just listen to the ladies and do what they tell you.”
A contraction started and she cried out, squeezing Roux’s hand until it passed. He went pale and David stepped up, putting his hands on Roux’s shoulders.
“Okay son. Let’s get out of her so they can do what they have to.”
“Ciara, I love you. You know that. I’ll be right outside.”
He bent and kissed her. Her skin was now hot and her eyes were going glassy from fever.
“I love you too Roux.”
David took him from the cabin and they began their vigil, waiting for news.

Various members of the Rats joined them, waiting for news. They tried to get Roux to eat, but he would take nothing. Muffled sounds came from the cabin and after three hours, Roux went up on deck. The strain was getting to him. He wanted to be with Ciara, couldn’t bear the thought of her in there in pain. He had spent the first hour thinking of what she was going through, and the second realizing that the baby they had been dreaming of was not to be. He made his peace with losing the child. He just wanted Ciara to be out of pain.
Natalie came to get him on the deck. The look of sadness on his face told him there was more going on than just the baby.
“Roux, she lost a lot of blood. We haven’t told her about the baby. She…”
“Natalie?”
“She’s going too Roux. Ciara is dying.”
Roux’s entire body went numb. His brain refused to accept the words. Ciara couldn’t die. It had to be some sort of a nightmare. He had to wake up.
“Roux, you need to go with her now. Reassure her, talk to her.”
He nodded and made his way down. He could see the grief on everyone’s face as he passed through. They touched his arm or patted his back as he walked past them. He felt as if he were going to the gallows. Outside the door, he paused. Checking his tears, he took a deep breath and entered the cabin.
There was no sign of the struggle she had gone through left in the room. She looked small and pale in the bed. He climbed in next to her. Her eyes opened and she smiled.
“They say we have a daughter, Roux. A beautiful little girl.”
“Yes.”
“I am so tired now. I wanted to hold her but they wouldn’t let me.”
“You need to rest. Save your strength for…”
Roux’s voice caught in his throat. Ciara didn’t seem to take notice. He pulled her into his arms, stroking her hair. She sighed.
“I love you Roux. It’s all all right isn’t it?”
“Yes, baby.”
“I think I am going to go to sleep now. I am just exhausted.”
“Ciara? You know how much I love you. You know I always will, right?”
“Yes, Roux. And I will always love you. My dear husband.”
She turned her face up to him for a kiss. It was the sweetest thing he had ever felt. She nestled her head on his chest again, and within five minutes, her breathing had stopped, and she was gone. Roux lay with her in his arms, crying silent tears of loss. His heart ached and he felt as if someone had gutted him. He couldn’t bring himself to let her go yet. He lay there for an hour, until Cassie and David knocked and came in.
He let them move her and David led him to the deck while Natalie helped Cassie prepare her for visitors. Roux moved as if he were in a dream, stunned, empty. He nodded at the people who came on. Carl and Yolanda came on board with Kathy, and they stood, not sure what to expect. Roux looked up at them from where he sat, and his tears broke. He held his arms out and Kathy ran to him.
“Roux, why are you crying?”
The little girl didn’t understand.
And neither did he.

Epilogue
Kathy (1956)
They told her the story of Papa Roux’s sad eyes when she was old enough to understand. He had never once made her feel it was her fault Ciara had died. In fact, he had gone out of his way her entire life to make her feel special. Her own father was killed before the end of the war in an aerial raid one day wile he was in town. Papa Roux stepped in and became her surrogate father. He was always there when she needed him, and would give her away at her wedding and be the grandfather to her children. She already knew when she had a daughter, she would name it Ciara.
Her greatest sadness was to watch him alone day after day. He seemed happy enough being single. Many women tried to catch his eye. He was a handsome man. When she was little, she dreamed that she would marry him herself. Now that she was older, she knew that that wouldn’t happen. He was wonderful with all of the children in the River Rats. She knew he would have been a great father, his love and compassion had no bounds.
She looked over to where he sat on his boat, leather jacket shining in the early Spring sun. It was cool out, but no one seemed to notice. They would be heading up the river tomorrow, leaving their winter camp. Kathy was going to go to where Ciara and her baby, Danielle, were buried. She came every year to say good-bye before they left. She had some ribbon flowers she had made to place on the grave. As she stood, once again talking to her friend who never answered, she felt someone come up beside her.
“Those are lovely. Ciara would have been so proud of how you grew up.”
“Papa Roux, I don’t think I have ever said I’m sorry to you.”
“Hmm? For what?”
“For, this.”
She gestured to the grave.
“Kathy, come here, sit by me.”
They sat beside the marker where the green and pink ribbons waved in the breeze. He rested his arm around her shoulder and she lay her head on his. She could see his no color stone necklace peeking from the fabric of his shirt. Kathy reached up to touch it, and he covered her hand with his. She could almost swear she felt a heartbeat in the stone.
“I made my peace with this a long time ago. It wasn’t your fault, it was just what was supposed to happen. I don’t know why. But I know that one day, I’ll see them again. I rather imagine my Danielle would be like you.”
Kathy started to cry. How one person could be so calm and accepting was a puzzle to her. Maybe it came from being in charge of the Rats. One had to have a cool head to deal with the sometimes vicious people they encountered in their travels. Most people thought of them as the lowest class. Roux was always quick to step up and disarm hostilities, apologizing even if they had done nothing.
“Papa Roux, are you happy?”
“Happy enough. This is only one part of life, here on Earth. I know what you are asking, and maybe one day someone will touch my heart again. It could be at the next town on the river. It could be years, it could be never. If it is meant to happen, it will.”
He put his arm around her shoulder and gave her a hug.
“You can’t spend your life chasing dreams. Have them, guard them, believe in them, but don’t chase them Like a butterfly they’ll fly away from you. Just hold them in your heart and wait for them to land.”
“Yes, Papa Roux.”
“Now, let’s get back for dinner. We have to finish packing for the morning.”
He held out his hand and Kathy took it, standing. They walked back to the camp of the River Rats, ready to face the waters and whatever might blow in on the north wind.

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